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Thursday, 09 September 2010 | The Mardale Times
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Chilling New Bin Laden Video
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Written by Ronald Pecorry   
Sunday, 30 September 2007
Terrorist leader Osama Bin Laden today released a chilling new video calling for an all out attack on American Institutions. A bearded Bin Laden, filmed in front of his security blanket, called for sustained attacks on several pillars of US society including the United States Postal Service, Internet Service Providers and Congressional Offices nationwide.

 In an appeal to Islamic Environmentalists everywhere he called for massive email and letter writing campaign to overwhelm these critical hubs of US Infrastructure.
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Blue-nose Blue-Tongue Bluetooth Plot Foiled
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Written by Carey Hunt   
Friday, 28 September 2007

An Ibrox-based religious fundamentalist group was last night behind bars after a dawn raid by police.

It's alleged that they had tried to infect large numbers of cattle with the bluetongue virus, planning the operation using Orange mobile phones.

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Asteroids pain for NASA
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Written by Bob Oberheim   
Thursday, 27 September 2007
SASA (Scottish Aeronautics Space Administration) yesterday announced a suprise mission and pinched the limelight from NASAs upcoming asteroid-belt mission with a spacecraft named SCLAF (Space Camera Large Asteroid Finder). The 3 billion-mile, eight-year journey to probe the earliest stages of the solar system will begin with liftoff, planned for just after sunrise Thursday from the recently opened Cape Cumbernauld Space Center and Outlet Mall. Rain is forecast as usual, however, and could force a delay.

The mission is being hailed as a triumph for low cost deep space exploration by top xylophonist Sir Patrick Moore.


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